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Concern Grows For Young Girls Posting ‘Am I Pretty?’ Videos Online

By Michelle Durham

PHILADELPHIA (CBS) — It’s a disturbing online sight, repeated hundreds if not thousands of times: girls, young teens or even younger, posting videos of themselves on YouTube asking the public to tell them if they are pretty.

For a 12- or 13-year-old, image is everything.  Many students at Haddonfield Middle School said they had seen these videos and found them troubling.

“Well, I feel really bad for the girls, that they have gotten to the point where they have to post videos,” said seventh grader Annie Gosse.  “They’ve probably been bullied at school about it.  And I feel like it’s really sad that they’ve gotten to that point, and they should get help before they do that.”

ami group  durham Concern Grows For Young Girls Posting Am I Pretty? Videos Online

(Haddonfield Middle School counselor Danielle McKelvey, left, with 7th graders Megan Becerril, Annie Gosse, and Emily Onimus. Credit: Michelle Durham)

Fellow student Megan Becerril said if one of her friends posted such a video, she would try to be supportive:

“I would tell her that she is beautiful, because everyone is beautiful in their own way.”

“I think it’s a tough age for self-esteem,” notes school counselor Danielle McKelvey.  “It’s so important for kids of this age to know what everyone else is thinking.  And what we want to do is try to build them up so they feel good about themselves and not open it up to something that could be so seemingly negative.”

McKelvey hopes the posts spark conversation between parents and children about this and other important issues.

More from Michelle Durham
  • ChewyVisual

    When you don’t have a strong male role model acting as the girl’s father, she will take being told she is pretty any way she can get it. A strong woman doesn’t need to be told she is pretty, she knows she is pretty.
    Pretty Vacant…..

    • JWS

      +10 for Sex Pistols reference.

    • Mongo

      And we don’t care…

  • Jonathan Johnstone

    a question asked by the majority of girls since the dawn of time… now they ask it on youtube and suddenly it’s “of concern”

    • CD

      I thought hte question asked since the dawn of time was, “Does this dress make me look fat?” :)

      • Mattildo

        And I always thought the answer was, “No, your FAT makes you look fat”.

  • Mike

    Great! Now we’ll have to institute some sort of government program to help these poor girls’ self esteem. Where are the REAL DADS in this country?!?!? That’s OUR job!

    • Eli

      Completely Agree with Mike! I tell my daughter how beautiful she is all the time, and if you ask her if she is pretty she will tell you: I am gorgeous! Step up men, raise your daughters and convince them no one is good enough for them! It’s going to take a very special guy to date mine, that’s for sure!

  • Carmen Childers

    Someone needs to tell these girls that they’re going to turn thirty whether they’re pretty or not and to FOCUS ON SCHOOL WORK, not on all of the cute boys who won’t look so good when they’re thirty either.

  • MZ

    12 year old girls should be building snowmen, drawing pictures, and playing board games or sports with their girl friends. Let them be kids and not worry about that junk! But if you as a parent are going to allow them to wander all over the internet, the issues mentioned in this article are inevitable. There is NO LAW that says your kids have to have unlimited access on the internet. And there are plenty of ways to “whitelist” your computer so only a handful of approved sites are available. You can get a filter or even set up user accounts with restrictions (for free).

    • Sally

      If anyone is to blame its the television over sexualizing them, before the boys can even catch up.

      • derf

        So then don’t buy them a TV and put it i their room, or pay for cable which broadcasts this evil into your home, problem solved right? Oh, whats that, you have to make sure your daughter has everything her friends do, you have to keep pace with YOUR friends down the block…

        Gee, I wonder where this shallow sense of what is important to these kids comes from…

      • Cat

        So true.

    • Berto

      What difference does it make? We are all the result of acts of randomness, governed by the simple idea that the strong should survive and the weak should die out. These girls are simply expressing that animalistic nature evolved through millions of years of evolution. If they don’t appeal to the opposite gender they will not be able to breed; they will instead be the weakest and should die out.

      So tell me, do you subscribe to Darwinism or don’t you? You cannot have it both ways.

  • Dutra

    Get good grades. It will boost your self esteem like nothing else.

    • Jack P

      Exactly. Perform well academically in HS and get accepted into a strong academic college on a scholarship. Study math, science, engineering, technology, or medicine. After you graduate, you will be the envy of your former classmates as you leave them in the dust and succeed in life.

  • slickzip

    It’s a sad thing that things have come to this ,,, thanks hollywood and TV ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

  • Password

    It’s called attention seeking. Females mostly (and some males) do this all the time. This isn’t anything new, just a new way of getting attention.

  • Concern Grows For Young Girls Posting ‘Am I Pretty?’ Videos Online « CBS Philly | The Information Nation

    […] Concern Grows For Young Girls Posting ‘Am I Pretty?’ Videos Online « CBS Philly. Posted in Other […]

  • bob kiely

    I don’t know if any of the 4 girls posted are making the inquiry, but they all look very prety me. They all have fresh, confident looks and balanced features. They shouldn’t have to worry what a bunch of strangers think of them Another man’s head is a poor place for ones hapiness.

    • Josh

      why is vanity at the top of the list these days? I’m more attracted to a girl who has a very active and unique mind, and just so happens to be physically attractive.

      • adfasdf

        lol.. ok, reread that…

  • bobc87

    The only people that should be concerned are the parents of the girls. If the parents are not monitoring what their children are doing with their computers, wireless phones and other tech devices then they are essentially granting their children permission to do whatever they want.

  • Doug Lynn

    We have this problem because virtuous character is not valued very much any more. Selfish serial harlots like Kim Kardashian are celebrated, even worshiped. I know a man that was very handsome. He married a stunningly beautiful young woman that cheated, lied to, hated on, and divorced him. He then married a woman of below average looks and outstanding moral character that loved him and his kids and he found real happiness. With each passing year, his joy and contentment grew.

    • mark

      If you want to be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife. If you want my personal point of view find an ugly woman to marry you!

    • Todd

      >Doug. Your reply is also tried and true. I have seen many beautiful women whose hearts, I’ve learned, are not, and I really can’t see them as beautiful any longer. A wise woman cultivates a beautiful inner character that will last and bless her husband, children, employer, and community. This does not fade, and will always appeal and attract. A wise man will recognize this, and not be mislead or deceived by the lust of his eyes. If his love for his wife is primarily based on her fleeting beauty, how will he love her when she is old, sick, injured–when she needs his love the most.

  • JustAGuy

    Social media is NOT good. Gullible people are seduced into blaring all their business to peeping strangers. It’s not socially healthy, and not only that, people don’t even realize their tweets, their Google activity and Facebook activity are filtering through government computer systems. Big brother knows about you! They just know much more when you frequent social media.

  • Burt in PA

    Did the Haddonfield Middle School counselor Danielle McKelvey ask the same question and join in the YouTube post?

  • Wendy

    The main problem here goes to the parents who don’t take the time to tell their daughters to have self-respect for themselves; if they don’t no one else will. Teens should know they don’t need to get ‘approval’ from others, but from themselves about they they feel about themselves. Parents need to talk to their teens and instill in them the “self-confidence to empower themselves to have ‘self’-respect and to believe’ in themselves, and understand that the most important beauty comes from within regardless as looks fade. No one should define the value of another person. Parents need to empower their children and put the emphasis on intelligence… not judgements on themselves or others.

    • Bob

      Please. In a study of self-esteem, do you know who had the highest levels? Convicts in prison. The entire “I must love me” movement is creating a generation unable to develop healthy and normal inner self-reflection. These kids are addicted to attention, and it is absolutely unhealthy on a whole host of levels.

    • matt2717

      Great points. I would add that parents should also be very wary of allowing children to post such videos that can be seen by any creep or human trafficker worldwide. In this sick, upside-down world, the predators abound. Worse, they are becoming emboldened by the internet, suddenly realizing they’re not alone in their bizarre and twisted urges.

      • ThisAintPretty

        A better headline would be Are Americans Ignorant? Unelected officials have taken over Washington and the media to prevent the truth from leaking out. We have no president after the coup and cover up.

        There is no democracy. Our next election is shaping up to be as big of a sham as the last. Do you know why Sarah Palin’s bus tour was really canceled? Do you know why she stayed 30 miles away from the second debate and chose the death of Steve Jobs to announce that she’s not running? Know what leaked out? Sarah Palin and Cain aren’t in the race for the same reason, the truth leaked out. Search PalinsDirtyLittleSecret for the biggest cover up in history

  • Jim

    These girls need to buy Troy McClure’s new DVD series, “Get Confident, Stupid!”

  • Joe

    It’s a bell curve. Not everyone can be in the top half.

  • Tom F

    If you need to ask, you aren’t. But who cares?

    People become more or less attractive as you get to know them. I have seen pretty girls turn ugly and less superficially attractive girls prove to be beautiful.

    • Cat

      Also, as people age they look different. My girlfriend was a late bloomer. Very tall and flat until she turned 17 or so now she is really sexy. I’ve seen the pictures, it is true.

  • obama hater

    i blame obama!!

    • Tom F

      He blames Bush!

      • just me

        We should blame Al Gore, he'[s the one who invented the internet.

      • kmrod

        He blames Clinton!

  • David FeHill

    They will probably all grow up to be still in college at age 30 and whine to congress that they need free contraceptives to support their beautiful life style.

    • a trapper cabral

      good one,dave. I wish i was a little a little faster on the uptake to beat you,but i’m 74 and slooooo.

    • obama hater

      thats what im talking about! why would rush apologize? i have lost a little (tiny) bit of respect for him. if bush was president you know these girls would grow up hating muslims instead and when that happens, well everyone wins!

      • JWS

        Tom F…. HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! That’s awesome. Every time I think the postmodernists can’t be any more stupid, I’m proven wrong.

      • Tom F

        It is not permissible to use words that accurately describe someone. I was at an event today where women were referred to as “persons who identify as female.”

  • FN_Jerk

    Girls, especially tween and teen girls, are FN dumb. More than likely if they posted something like that they already know they are easy on the eyes but use the “Am i pretty?” call to divert attention away from their ugly personalities.

  • Noonan

    And the thumb nail links to the side of this story include pictures of the Wing Bowl, some sort of Victoria Secret show, and a skinny blonde weather person. Hmmm…wonder why girls are putting so much value in appearances. Do the cbsphilly editors see any irony here?

    • USArmyCombatMedic

      The folks in charge of searching for revenue will put up whatever is tasteful and that people will click on. Can you blame them? It’s business..

    • Ray

      Hear, hear!

      • kmrod

        No, the editors are on line asking the question “are we stupid”?

  • message for the girls

    Everyone wants to be loved… but you never feel lacking if you are sincerely focused on giving love to others in need. Give it away girls, love properly, the way Jesus wants you to.

  • Laura

    These posts by girls predate YouTube. I’ve seen them for years on Yahoo Answers. They used to post their photos along with them. What is also disturbing is that some people will go on there and tell them they are ugly or unattractive…or worse.

  • Laura

    These posts by girl predate YouTube. I’ve seen them for years on Yahoo Answers. They used to post their photos along with them. What is also disturbing is that some people will go on there and tell them they are ugly or unattractive…or worse.

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