Tale of the tape
One Broken Arm Later: Nate Burleson’s Pizza Vs. DiGiorno (It’s Not Delivery)
|Probably not. Unless he was the one delivering it. In which case, his agent’s gotta get him a new contract.||Delivery?||Not...sure. If only there was some resource to tell us whether or not DiGiorno was delivered or not.|
|One would assume “low”, but, well, here we are.||Level of Risk?||Low.|
|Burned tongue; crippling diarrhea||Worst Risk of Injury?||An arm shattered in two places, apparently.|
|November, best case scenario||Ready for action after consumption?||The next day, unless he went heavy on the red pepper flakes.|
|MAYbe...he got the pizza from an establishment owned by a Packers fan!||Conspiracy Theory Moment?||MAYbe...it actually IS delivery! Wait, who cares?|
|Depends. Was it meat lovers?||Worth crashing a car over?||Heavens, I can’t imagine.|
The winner is
More Tales of the tape
National Championship Matchup: #8 Kentucky Vs. #7 Connecticut
No. 8-seeded Kentucky stunned No. 2-seeded Michigan in the Elite Eight and shut down Wisconsin’s Frank Kaminsky and the Badgers offense in the Final Four.
Semifinal Matchup: #8 Kentucky Vs. #2 Wisconsin
Wisconsin—who was overshadowed by other top Big Ten teams in the tournament in Michigan and Michigan State—is now the last man standing and hoping to win it all with the likes of big man, Frank Kaminsky.
Semifinal Matchup: #7 Connecticut Vs. #1 Florida
It was three years ago that Jim Calhoun led the UConn Huskies to the college basketball national championship. That Final Four included two of the teams in this year’s Final Four in UConn and Kentucky