The Sixers: Who Are These Guys?
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By Spike Eskin
PHILADELPHIA (CBS) – It was minutes before the Sixers eventual loss to the Oklahoma City Thunder. I don’t call it an “eventual loss” because it’s the day after the game, and I know it was a loss. I call it that because the outcome was about as set-in-stone as it could have been, even just before the game. To the teams, to the fans, to the players, to the referees, to everyone.
And there stood Thaddeus Young, with his arm around one of the game’s referees. Thaddeus Young, who reportedly asked to be traded. Thaddeus Young, who is still here. Thaddeus Young, who is on a team that is so bad, that even the general manager and coach telling him “shoot as much as you want!” isn’t enough to make up for the misery.
Young, with his arm around the official, was pointing out players, and telling the referee who is whom. This is just a guess as to what was going on, but the referee was nodding, and writing things down as Young said things. It’s fair to assume that the referee had no idea who anyone on the Sixers was because, well, nobody does.
I do, because I’m a sick person who watches too much basketball. Brett Brown does (probably) because he gets paid to. But most everyone has no idea who any of these guys are.
The title of this post leaves two options. The first, is to let you know just who each of these guys is. Where they went to school, what you can expect from them, and so on, and so on. But really, what’s the point? Most of them will be gone next year anyway.
I’m going with the second option, which is a challenge to you. The challenge is, “try to see how many of these guys you can name.” Don’t cheat, and look up jersey numbers. No Google image searches. I’m not including Michael Carter-Williams, Thaddeus Young, Evan Turner or Spencer Hawes. Everyone knows MCW and Young, and I just don’t want to look at Turner or Hawes’ face anymore.
I’d love to know your scores.
Let’s start off with this guy.
Next, we’ll move on to this guy. You should know him.
What about this guy?
Didn’t think so. And this guy? He’s not on the team anymore.
This guy isn’t on the team anymore either.
I bet you got that one wrong. No, it’s not Andrew Bynum or Willie Green. Let’s try this one. He’s one of my favorites.
This guy, he tries hard, but doesn’t seem to have much basketball skill at all.
Hope you got that one. He’s one of my favorites. Now this guy. He’s gone too.
Now this guy. He’s a point guard. That’s your hint.
And this guy, he’s Hollis Thompson. Whoops. Make pretend I didn’t say that. Ok, who is he?
And finally this guy, he’s the worst player I’ve ever seen in my 37 year-old life.