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Chip Kelly Sarcasm Report: How Many Attributes Do I Have?

By Spike Eskin

PHILADELPHIA (CBS) – The Eagles aren’t the best team in the NFL. They’re not even top 15 (probably). Chip Kelly may end up being a great coach, or he may be a failure. There’s not too much football related that you can put on the “success” list for Kelly so far.

But Chip Kelly’s sarcasm game? It’s elite. Chip’s press conferences are infinitely more entertaining than Andy Reid’s, though I did enjoy Big Red’s commitment to his greatest hits.

So each time Chip speaks to the media, I’ll pull out some of his most entertaining, sarcastic quips. The bolded sections are the media.

Kelly was asked how important an attribute “confidence” is in a quarterback:

Chip: How many attributes do I have?

Kelly was told “as many attributes as you want.”:

Chip: Out of 100, I would rate it seventh.

Kelly was asked if he looks at Michael Vick’s injury history when deciding his future play:

Chip: I don’t know what I would go off of. Am I going to say, Mike, I don’t think you should play this week because three years ago you got hurt?

Kelly was asked if there’s been a learning curve for Trent Cole playing linebacker:

Chip: I mean, I thought he had scoliosis or something.

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