Suicide Watch Week 3: Easy Street
PHILADELPHIA (CBS) – Week 2 was a battle for most of us trying to survive. Unless you picked Green Bay (a smart pick), Seattle (risky in the moment, not so much in retrospect) or Denver (poor Eli), you spent your Sunday afternoon sweating out a one-possession game. Even if you went with the Patriots last Thursday, I imagine you were yelling at your TV as loudly as Tom Brady.
My pick, the Falcons, were up three touchdowns early, which meant I could kick my feet up and focus on the Eagles game. When I checked back in and the Rams had cut the deficit to seven in the fourth quarter, I quickly turned it off. If the Falcons were going to collapse and kill me in the process, I didn’t want to watch. Atlanta held on, and I’m still breathing.
If you didn’t have a similar Sunday experience last week, you definitely did in week 1. So far, 22 games have been decided by a touchdown or less. It’s a near-impossible spot to avoid. The parity gives me nightmares. Just ask the eliminated souls who were so sure the Eagles would fly by the Chargers or that the Lions would devour the Cardinals.
Not to worry, because good news is coming. You ready? Here it comes. This week there are two games made in Suicide Pool heaven. The only dilemma I have is deciding which one to pick and which one to call the lock of the week. Both are so sweet I can’t even stand it. Let’s jump in before my excitement takes over I lose the ability to form sentences.
My Selection – Seahawks vs. Jaguars
If gambling were legal, how high does this line have to be for you to even consider taking Jacksonville? It opened at 16.5, which was laughable, and has since moved to right around 20. Seattle just smoked the 49ers 29-3, reminding us how dominant Russell Wilson and that defense are at home. I wouldn’t touch the Jags with a 25-point pole.
Jacksonville has scored one touchdown in eight quarters, and Maurice Jones-Drew will be playing, if at all, on a sprained ankle. No team has given up fewer points than the Seahawks (10), and no team has scored less than the Jaguars (11). Let’s relax this week and take pleasure in Jacksonville’s misery. It’ll be fun.
Best Bet for Survival – Broncos vs. Raiders
Peyton Manning against Terrelle Pryor. On Monday night. In Mile High. Denver is unstoppable. Force. Oakland is movable object. Uh oh. My excitement has. Taken. Over. I need. Drink. Something. To delay my enthusiasm. This lock is. My lock. Can’t. Form. Sentences.
Cheating Death – Rams at Cowboys
Okay, I’m back. My underdog last week was a Ryan Howard-sized swing and miss. I anticipated a close game between heated rivals that would be decided in the final minutes. It wasn’t. So I’m looking to bounce back here.
The Rams have showed the inability to roll over and accept defeat. They a lot of young talent on offense and enough pride to play hard until the final buzz, regardless of the score. They made a game out of it in Atlanta, when they looked dead in the water, and the Cowboys are far from the Falcons.
Dallas has scored one fourth-quarter touchdown, and it was a gift-wrapped pick-six against the Giants. St. Louis has scored 28 fourth-quarter points, all on offense. Only the Denver Broncos have scored more in the final 15. I’m counting on Jason Garrett and Tony Romo grabbing a lead, and then watching it fade away down the stretch.
An easy week, so enjoy the freebie. And because you just never know, please excuse me while I knock on wood.
Justin Boylan is a producer at 94WIP and graduate of Temple University. You can email him at email@example.com and follow him on Twitter @justintboylan.